The ballot or the bullet? Cruz should challenge `sniveling coward’ Trump to a duel

Andrew Jackson fatally shot William Dickinson in a duel for casting aspersions on his wife

Good Friday Austin:

The Republican presidential campaign moved further into the darkness yesterday

Trump didn’t like the Facebook ad that an anti-Trump super PAC unaffiliated with the Cruz campaign ran in the run-up to the Utah caucuses, where Cruz creamed Trump.

 

Screen Shot 2016-03-22 at 5.16.50 AMIn retaliation, Trump went on the attack against Heidi Cruz, which seemed on the face of it pretty despicable.

Yesterday, in Wisconsin, Cruz responded, “Donald, you’re a sniveling coward and leave Heidi the hell alone.”

Asked if he would still support Trump, as he has pledged, if he is he ultimate nominee, Cruz replied. “I am going to beat him for the nomination … Donald Trump is not going to be the nominee.”

This sounds like a scene out of movie.

The other day, earlier in this quarrel, Cruz borrowed an apropos line from The American President.

I don’t see what’s wrong in reciting a little Aaron Sorkin at an appropriate moment.

Cruz, who once aspired to be an actor, is a bona fide movie buff and a bit of a ham.

His favorite movie – the one he has memorized like it is the U.S. Constitution – is The Princess Bride.

It seems to me Cruz has now reached that moment when he should deliver a variation on perhaps the most famous line from the movie.

Hello. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die.

Montoya is addressing that evil, six-fingered vulgarian, Count Tyrone Rugen.

It seems to me that Trump has now tread into territory where Cruz has every right to challenge him to duel to defend his wife’s honor.

Repeat after me: Hello. My name is Rafael Edward Cruz. You insulted my wife. Prepare to die.

From Jay Nordlinger in National Review:

 Of Donald Trump’s vile streak, I needed no more proof. He mocked a handicapped person — physically mocked him, imitated him. He said despicable things about Megyn Kelly and Carly Fiorina. He compared Ben Carson to a child molester. (Turns out, Carson didn’t mind so much, but that’s a different story . . .) He praised and defended Putin. He expressed the moral equivalence that one usually hears from the Left: “I think our country does plenty of killing also.”
But Trump’s antics in regard to Heidi Cruz are a new low. I’ve known Ted and Heidi for many years. In fact, I will have a piece on this subject in the next National Review: the one that becomes available tomorrow. Furthermore, I’ll expand on that piece in my online column.
Screen Shot 2016-03-24 at 10.41.42 PMWhen I met Heidi, she was Heidi Nelson, an economic-policy whiz and beautiful, sporty California blonde. She had been in faraway places, on missions. She had hiked and trekked all over. She was exceptionally capable, and she was fearless. You can see why Ted was drawn to her, and why anyone would be. Like me and most other people, she has had highs and lows. Life has a way of being eventful. And Heidi, in my experience, has been a picture of poise, grace, and perseverance.
If Ted is president, I think Americans will like him a lot — more than they know now. If Heidi is first lady, they’ll probably like her even more. She can teach Trump, his supporters, and his apologists a thing or two about how to treat people.
I have nothing against Melania Trump. I’ve liked all of Trump’s wives. I like Trump too, for that matter, except when he’s being vile, or trying to be president. I think Mrs. Trump No. 2 was my favorite. She was beautiful, like all of them, and I liked the way her husband said her name: “Mawla.” “Mawla, she’s turrific.”
Melania was once a model (duh). She is Slovenian, and, trust me, even an average Slovenian is attractive. You ever been to Ljubljana? There are few other places like it. Pepperdine University comes to mind. And Ole Miss. Naturally, Melania has had racy photo shoots, and an anti-Trump PAC used one.
The Cruz campaign had nothing to do with it. But Trump lashed out at Ted, and Heidi.

Perhaps anticipating this day might come, the voters in Wisconsin 41 years ago voted to amend the state Constitution to repeal a provision that barred anyone who engaged in a duel from holding public office.

I assume that means that Ted Cruz could demand satisfaction in Wisconsin, shoot and either kill or maim Trump, and remain eligible to win the critical April 5 Wisconsin primary, where he is now running even with Trump. And, if you’re going to stop Trump, you’re going to have do better than a hashtag.

Back in 1975, most Wisconsinites supported the ballot measure, and those that didn’t were probably all Democrats anyway.

From Ballotpedia:

The Wisconsin Dueling and Disenfranchisement Amendment was a legislatively referred constitutional amendment on the April 1, 1975 ballot in Wisconsin, where it was approved.

This amendment modified Article XIII, Section 2 of the Wisconsin Constitution to repeal a unique provision that barred people from voting or holding public office if they had been found guilty of dueling.[1]

Election results

Screen Shot 2016-03-24 at 11.21.02 PM

Text of measure

The language that appeared on the ballot:

“Shall section 2 of article XIII of the constitution, which provides penalties unique shall to the offense of dueling, be amended to eliminate the requirement that person who engages in a duel shall be forever disqualified from voting or holding public office?”[1]

Sure, there might be rioting in some Trump neighborhoods (which are usually situated cheek-by-jowl with the Muslim-American enclaves that Cruz would like to have patrolled), and there is the possibility that Cleveland, where the Republican National Convention is being held in July, might be burned to the ground.

But, many Americans would be relieved and, just as freshly-minted and super-reluctant Cruz supporter Lindsey Graham said a month ago – If you killed Ted Cruz on the floor of the Senate, and the trial was in the Senate, nobody would convict you.– I don’t think, after what Trump tweeted about Heidi Cruz, any jury of decent, God-fearing Wisconsonites would convict him.

I mean look at Trump’s negatives back in February’s Marquette Law School Poll in Wisconsin.

Screen Shot 2016-03-24 at 10.47.19 PM

And here’s how uncomfortable they’d be with Trump as the GOP nominee.

Screen Shot 2016-03-24 at 10.47.28 PM

Also, if elected, Cruz wouldn’t be the first president to have killed a man in a duel.

Andrew Jackson – the populist-nationalist, big-haired, uncouth, other-hating Donald Trump of his day – for one.

From the History Network, this day in history, for May 30

On this day in 1806, future President Andrew Jackson kills a man who accused him of cheating on a horse race bet and then insulted his wife, Rachel.Contemporaries described Jackson, who had already served in Tennessee’s Senate and was practicing law at the time of the duel, as argumentative, physically violent and fond of dueling to solve conflicts. Estimates of the number of duels in which Jackson participated ranged from five to 100.Jackson and Dickinson were rival horse breeders and southern plantation owners with a long-standing hatred of each other. Dickinson accused Jackson of reneging on a horse bet, calling Jackson a coward and an equivocator. Dickinson also called Rachel Jackson a bigamist. (Rachel had married Jackson not knowing her first husband had failed to finalize their divorce.) After the insult to Rachel and a statement published in the National Review in which Dickinson called Jackson a worthless scoundrel and, again, a coward, Jackson challenged Dickinson to a duel.On May 30, 1806, Jackson and Dickinson met at Harrison’s Mills on the Red River in Logan, Kentucky. At the first signal from their seconds, Dickinson fired. Jackson received Dickinson’s first bullet in the chest next to his heart. Jackson put his hand over the wound to staunch the flow of blood and stayed standing long enough to fire his gun. Dickinson’s seconds claimed Jackson’s first shot misfired, which would have meant the duel was over, but, in a breach of etiquette, Jackson re-cocked the gun and shot again, this time killing his opponent. Although Jackson recovered, he suffered chronic pain from the wound for the remainder of his life.Screen Shot 2016-03-25 at 10.00.10 AMJackson was not prosecuted for murder, and the duel had very little effect on his successful campaign for the presidency in 1829. Many American men in the early 1800s, particularly in the South, viewed dueling as a time-honored tradition. In 1804, Thomas Jefferson’s vice president Aaron Burr had also avoided murder charges after killing former Treasury secretary and founding father Alexander Hamilton in a duel. In fact, Rachel’s divorce raised more of a scandal in the press and in parlors than the killing of Dickinson. 

I assume Cruz would choose as his second his sure-shooting brother of the duck blind, Phil Robertson.

Screen Shot 2016-01-14 at 2.59.25 AM

 

Meanwhile, Trump could go with his campaign manager – brawling Corey Lewandowski – or with this weaselly apparatchik who appeared on his behalf, defending the attack on Heidi Cruz as fair and balanced.

Meanwhile, in another land, far, far away.

 

 

 

 

Reader Comments 0

0 comments